Yo mama jokes

Your mom is so fat Buzz Lightyear had to say "To infinity to beyond" to leave her house.

Picture of yo mama last Christmas and the damn thing’s still printing.

Your mom is so fat the space shuttle can see her from 10,000 miles away.

You wanna know the difference between a rake and your mom? The rake is actually useful.

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Your mom does not need the internet. She's already worldwide.

Yo mama so fat when someone asked her to touch her chin, she asked, "Which one?"

Yo mama's teeth are so yellow kids thought they were mini school buses.

Yo mama so fat, she stepped on earth and the earth cracked.

Yo mama so stupid, she failed a survey.

Yo mama so ugly, she looks like a green bean with googly eyes.

Yo mama so old, her birth certificate expired.

Yo mama so ugly, when she was born, the doctor tried to put her back in.

Yo mama so fat, when they buried her, they named her Everest. Mount Everest.

Yo mama so ugly that when she watched The Outsiders, they became The Insiders.

Yo mama so strict that when Ponyboy told her that Darry hit him, she called the cops on Darry.

Yo mama so stupid that she tried to ride Ponyboy Curtis.

Yo mama so ugly that when the Kool-Aid Man busted through her wall, he said, “Oh no!”

I’m not religious, but you’re the answer to all of my prayers.

On a scale from 1 to America, how free are you this weekend?