Why jokes
Why didn't Michael Jackson get away with messaging with kids? Because they were all juveniles.
A man asks God, "Hello God, why did you make my wife so dumb?"
God replies, "So she would love you..."
Why did Catholic women stop going to church?
Because it takes Jesus three days to rise.
Ever had that feeling that suicidal people are a big contributor to the razor blade industry?
Well, they aren't.
Why?
They aren't repeated customers.
Why don't gays shop at sports authority?
They prefer Dick's.
Why doesn't Mexico win any medals in the summer Olympics anymore?
Because all the Mexicans that can run, swim, or jump are already here.
Why didn’t the autistic boy like Minecraft?
There was a new texture pack.
Why do teenage girls hang out in odd-numbered groups?
Because they can't even.
Why did Marxism never catch on in England?
Because then it would be impossible to get proper tea.
Why do orphans have only 363 days in their calendar year?
Because they don't have father's and mother's days.
Why are clips 30 rounds? Because that's the average class size.
Why do you Scotchmen wear kilts?
Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.
Why can’t you take an Asian guy golfing? Because you can’t drive. Every time he does, he tries to put a hole-in-one.
Do you know why they call me battery saver?
I get turned on when it’s below 10%.
In life, some people have it harder than others.
That's why Viagra exists.
Why the hell would I go to a shooting range when I could go to school and do it for free?
Why don’t Indians play soccer?
Because every time they’re at the corner, they build a store.
Why do Native Americans hate snow?
Because it's white and on their land.
Why does a kid never come home after a fight with their parents? Because they never found the key to the house again.
Why can’t Homer Simpson bring his family into Moe’s Tavern?
Because there’s a bartender in there.