Why jokes
Why can't orphans have a large bag of crisps?
Because it's family size! 😂
Why was Jesus Christ cut from the hockey team?
He kept getting nailed to the boards.
Why did Nicholas Cage and Angelina Jolie attend Paul Walker’s funeral?
He went from "The Fast and the Furious" to "Gone in 60 Seconds."
Me: Man, I wish my clothes were emo.
Friend: Why?
Me: So they would hang themselves.
Why wasn't Michael Jackson admitted to college? He refused to declare a major; he only wanted to do minors.
Why is a ketchup bottle like a kid? Cause they're like, "Squirt!" (squirt ketchup).
Why was the picture in jail? Because it got framed!
Why did Sally stare out the window for 24 hours straight?
Sally's used to being blind!
Why is it illegal to do reverse cowgirl in Alabama? You never turn your back to your family.
What does a perverted frog say? Rub it.
Why don't witches wear underwear? To get a better grip on their broom.
What do girls and rocks have in common? The flat ones get skipped.
What is red and goes 200 mph? A baby in a blender.
Me: Can you give me some drumsticks to eat?
Brother: Why though?
Me: So I can just drum up an appetite.
Why did the cow have for breakfast?
Answer: Muesli.
Someone asked me why I'm still here... the answer is simple: I don't want to be used as a school assembly.
Why do depressed people go to camp? To learn how to tie knots tighter.
Why do orphans play GTA?
To feel wanted.
Why do short people laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
Why did the CSI team have to go to the "Purple Rain" shoot?
Because they had to dust for Prince! hahaha
Wash It Away - By Bradley Lewis(watersharky) and Ben Lewis and Watersharky Music Productions - Why does it always feel like I'm the one that's had a bad day?
Whether I'm stuck in traffic or showing up to work late,
Oh this 9 to 5 feels like 9 to forever been working all week
For a jerk that thinks they can say whatever they want to me
I'll just bite my tongue for a couple more days
Soon I'll be in that island sun surfing those waves
I need the beach I love the ocean
Put my feet in the sand
Watch the earth in motion
Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day
Take it to the shoreside and wash it away
Oh yeah
You gotta wash it away
Finally I'm here and I can't even stop myself from smiling
Somebody hand me a beer and I'll check the girls on the island
Don't miss my 9 to 5
Living like a local on this island time
I got those sandy toes and nobody knows jump in the ocean and just go with the flow
I'll miss my sandy toes
I've got to go back before you know this island is my home
I need the beach I love the ocean
Put my feet in the sand
Watch the earth in motion
Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day
Take it to the shoreside and wash it away
Oh yeah
You gotta wash it away
Wash it away
I need the beach I love the ocean
Put my feet in the sand
Watch the earth in motion
Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day
Take it to the shoreside and wash it away
Oh yeah
You gotta
Wash it away
Wash it away
Why were the people in the Twin Towers such good readers?
They went through 110 stories in 10 seconds.
Why do orphans like to play GTA?
Because it's the only time they are wanted.