Whats jokes

What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?

The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.

My father always used to say:

"What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger."

Until the accident.

What do rappers like cantaloupe?

Because they’re always dropping fresh MELON!

What do you call a rapper who's also a doctor?

Dr. Dre.

What do you call a rapper who LOVES nature?

MC Green

What did the rapper say to his BLENDER?

"Mix it up, yo!"

What did the rapper say at the bakery?

"I need ALL the dough you got!"

What’s a ghost’s favorite type of pants?

BOO-TY JEANS!

What does a crooked lawyer who is not on the ACLU payroll have in common with a crooked politician who has an office in Washington, DC?

They both sign their names using a blue pen 🖊 🖊.

What the sigma?

What bird is good at gaming? A game bird.

What do you call an @EB with no ears?

An Explain B.

Q. What's the difference between Donald Trump and orange Jello?

A. The Jello has a higher IQ.

Listen, Man United might not thank me but get the contract out, put it on the table. Let him sign it, let him write whatever numbers he wants to put on there, given what he's done since he's come in. Ole's at the wheel, man. He's doing it. He's doing his thing. Man United are BACK.

Guys, do not follow Tom, he is super inappropriate. I did a 48-hour face reveal and this is what he said:

Tom 13 minutes ago Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ur so cute I wanna fuck your pussy so hard you look amazing I luv ur face come have sex with me mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

I was driving when I saw a kid chasing after a ball, but I didn’t have enough time to slow down. Then I pulled over, and the dad yelled, "What the fuck did you do?" I looked into the street and saw the ball completely deflated and the kid crying, "Now I gotta hear him bitch and moan all day," he continues.

Here is a story, my best friend was Chinese, his name was Chong-king. I took him to a restaurant one day and he said, "I am Chong-king." I said I know your name is Chong-king, within a few minutes he just randomly died making weird noises and turning blue by every second.

Anyone know what happened?

I went to an interview and my future boss said, "Hi, my name is Watt Niseto, meet you."

Then said, "WHAT IS UR NAME?" He then said,

"What is not my name, Watt is." So I replied, "Ugh fine, I guess I'll call you Wha." Then he said, "Wha I not my name."

And then I said, "Ugh fine, my name is Will Knott." He then replied, "Hi Will Not."

What do you call a squirrel that flies? A flying squirrel.

What's the difference between Paul Walker and my computer?

I care when my computer crashes.