I took my girlfriend to the beach, and a marine biologist thought she was a beluga whale.
Whale Jokes
Yo mama so fat when she jumped in the water, the whales started singing "We are a family, even though you fatter than me."
Little Johnny went to school and right before class started, he pulled down his pants and said, "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." After that, his teacher told him to put on his pants and go to the office. The principal asked him what he did, so he pulled down his pants and said, "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." Then the principal called his mom. The mom got there and took little Johnny home.
They got in the car, and his mother asked, "Johnny, what did you do this time?" So Johnny pulled his pants and said, "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." Once they got home, his dad was off work and heard that Johnny was coming home early from school. Once again he asked Johnny what he did. Johnny pulled down his pants and said, "Little fishy, little fishy, little fishy." After that, his dad was surprised, so his dad pulled down his pants and said, "Big whale, big whale."
What's a whale's favorite James Bond movie? "License to Krill."
What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?
One wags its tail, and the other tags a whale!
What does a shark smoke? Sea-weed.
How do whales breathe underwater? They take a deep meth.
Where does the killer whale go to get its teeth done?
The orca Don-tist.
What do whales use to rub out a mistake in their homework? Their blubber.
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide!!! 😂
Beach whales.
Suzy: How did Jonah fit in the whale?
Teacher: Whales are very big but have small mouths, so Jonah did not actually fit in the whale.
Suzy: Well, the Bible says he did.
Teacher: He did not.
Suzy: When I get to heaven I will ask him how he fit in.
Teacher: How do you know he went to heaven? Maybe he went to hell.
Suzy: Then you can ask him.
How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.
Yo mama is so fat, I thought she was a beach whale.
What did one male whale say to the other male whale?
"She's gonna blow!"
yo mama so fat she went swimming with the whales and sang "weeeeeee areeeee fammmilllyyyyy!!!!!!!"
Your momma's so fat, a whale said, "Hello, Mom!"
Two whales went to a bar.
The first whale said, "oooooooohhhhhh." The second whale said, "Greg, I think you're drunk, let's go home."
What did the whale say?
Nothing!
It just wailed.
Me: So you two girls are from England?
Girls: Wales.
Me: Oh, I see, so you two whales are from England.
I drew a picture of a whale in the ocean. My brother asked, "What are you drawing?" I said, "You taking a shower."