As a kid, I was made to walk the plank.
Because we couldn't afford a dog.
We Jokes
I just got off the phone with Kristen Stewart yesterday. She said I was invited to her cookout this Friday. I said I'll come by and bring some drinks, like wine, beer, and liquor, so we can get our freak on all night and drink some cherry wine until daybreak ends.
Prince, can we please chat now? Pls, pls! Love you!
Hey Gwen come on let's chat! We can forget about that dumb bitch "prince" and focus on us!
Gwen, can we please chat? 😊
We the jury are yet to deliver our final verdict, but we would like to have a guess.
Is it Mrs. Peacock with the candlestick in the library?
There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake, "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded, "'Cause I just bit my tongue!"
You're so fat you're the reason they made tread "meals".
You're so ugly we can't have neighbors.
Yo mama so fat when she steps on the scale it says, "We want your weight not your phone number."
What did the Indians say to the Arabs? "We are going to make 10/12!"
Me: Which WiFi are we on?
Coworker: Should be floor 89.
Me: What about flight 104?
Coworker: Oh crap!
I asked my friend, "Shouldn't we have 6 senses?"
He replied, "What is the 6th sense?"
"Common sense," I shot back while looking at the kid who was going to detention. "Never mind," I said.
Alright, class, we have 39 students and 40 seats.
That one dyslexic kid thinking he’s Superman:
What do we call a family photograph of an orphan?
A selfie.
We can only see 90 degrees.
I could tell my cousin you are so annoying, but she told me first, so we both said it at the same time. 🫣🤣😂
I set a gay person on fire. We now call him LGBBQ.
You realize we are tolerating you, right?
Every time my cousin and I, we settle it out with our game, so we play rock paper scissors. 😂🤣🤣
When the airplane saw the Twin Towers, it said, "We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we can't go around it, guess we will go through it."
