Why are most vacuums gay?
They’re always coming out of the closet.
Answering a knock at my door, I see a vacuum cleaner salesman who proceeds to tip a huge bucket of shit all over my carpet, before proclaiming any trace this hoover doesn't remove I will personally eat myself.
"Well, I hope you're hungry," I replied, "'cause they cut off my electric this morning!"
How does a rapper clean his house?
With a LIL' SCRUB.
Why did the rapper bring a vacuum to the concert?
So the haters could SUCK on him!
Q: What do a prostitute and a vacuum have in common?
A: If they stop sucking, you can smack them until they start again.
I had a broken vacuum, then I put a One Direction sticker on it and it suddenly sucked again.
I was going to tell a joke I made up about my vacuum cleaner, but it sucks.
What’s a vacuum cleaner’s favorite plant?
Answer: SUCCulent
Why couldn’t people use the George Floyd action figure? Because it was vacuum sealed.
What do vacuums and your mom have in common?
They both suck.
I sold my vacuum the other day.
All I got was dust and my mom's wig.
1. Full name: John.
2. Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run.
3. Favorite meal: the sphinx with the sour cream.
4. Sexual orientation: sexually disorientated.
5. Mental health: mentally retarded.
6. Previous careers: funeral undertaking, after that two years in the circus as the main brown bear, after that in the church school for two years, after this experience five years as a screw in the jail for the worst criminals with the top degree of supervision and now working for the secret services in my home country after gaining the top-secret audit.
7. Favorite pets: dog, bumble bee named Maxo, a butterfly named Redwing and the lizard named Notail.
8. Favorite activities: washing the dishes, cutting the woods, vacuuming and playing hard rock.
9. Working motivation: none.
I hope that you will accept my curriculum vitae and that we will see each other soon already as new colleagues, I wish more or less. Kind regards, John.
life sucks and so does the vacuum and other things
You suck harder than a vacuum ever will :)
Why is there no woman on the moon?
Because it doesn't need to be cleaned.
This joke is like a vacuum cleaner... it sucks.
"This vacuume sucks!" Vacuume: "yes, i do"
What kind of vacuum does an abortion center use? A: Dyson.
What sucks but doesn't suck?
Vacuums!
What do you get when you cross a vacuum and a rooster?
A cock sucker.
