Ups

Ups Jokes

Me people call me emo Older cosin why Becase i always have my hood up and where black cloths and ware black cross earrings

Teacher says okay class today were gonna talk about what everyone wants to be when they grow up Little Johnny how about you go first. Little jonny: " I want to be a speed bump when I grow up!"

Patient: doctor every time I look in a mirror, I feel ill, as if I'm about to throw up what's wrong with me? Doctor: I don't know but your eyesight is perfect.

Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you fuck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR FUCKED NOW