Twos jokes

The Twin Towers are just like genders.

There used to be two, but now it's a sensitive topic.

Why are the Twin Towers and after girls kill all boys similar?

There used to be two but now there's one...

I had to share a table recently with a disabled man. When I asked him for the salt and pepper, he had to make two trips.

Two Trojan warriors were patrolling the streets of Troy at night. It was finally time for their duties to be relieved. When they went back to their houses, one Trojan fell in a puddle. "Nitrogen!" The other called. And the other responded coldly, “Good night.”

Two pedos are on the beach.

One pedo said, "Hey, get out of my son!"

What goes pop pop sizzle sizzle?

Two dead babies in an acid bath.

A surgeon loses his job as he botched a surgery.

boss: "We have to let you go."

surgeon: "I protest innocence."

boss: "How?"

surgeon: "I thought doing your job and saving people's lives were two different things."

boss: "Get out!"

Why do pedos hate corona? Because they have to stay two meters away from children. 😈

When I was young, I got bullied by two kids, and whenever I got hit to the ground, I would get back up and cry. Then I had the courage to fight back, except they didn't get back up.

Why can't America play chess?

Because it lost two towers.

One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.

A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.

Yo mama is so fat, it takes two warlocks to summon her.

Why were the people during 9/11 mad because they ordered pepperoni sandwiches, but they got two planes?

Two Asians walked into a strip club and they went to a cashier. They put in their names: her name was He Gay and his name was Shi A Ho.

What happens when an angel and nun "have some fun and forget pills"?

The nun gets pregNUNt.

Two kids walked into a bar. They were covered with blood. The bartender asked what happened.

The youngest said, "Well, we were trying to paint our basement, but we threw the babies too hard!"

Teacher: Okay class, look at the person to the right of you and describe them with one word.

Me: *looks to the right of me and sees the pick-me girl* "Penny."

Teacher: *shocked* How is she a penny?

Me: 'Cause she's two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants. Not to mention worth practically nothing.

What do you call two homeless people throwing rocks at each other?

A pillow fight.

What does Michael Jackson and McDonald's have in common?

They both use 30-year-old meat in between two-year-old buns.

What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?

There were two when we were kids, but now it’s a touchy subject.