Tragedy jokes

I'd make a 9/11 joke, but it wouldn't fly anymore.

And if I tried it, it would probably crash and burn.

It just wouldn't help my comedy career take off.

Why is the sinking of Titanic different to sinking rapboat?

Titanic sinking was a tragedy, rapboat sinking is fucking funny.

The British equivalent to 9/11 would be a big red bus crashing into Big Ben.

The Twin Towers are like crippled legs; once they break, they can’t be fixed.

The other day I went to a museum. My friend and I went to the Holocaust section, and he got choked up when he saw the Anne Frank picture. I asked him, "Why are you sad? It's just an ashtray."

What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.

Like a shooter says, "I put the fun in funeral!"

What do you call plane crash victims?

Down to earth people.

My aunt used to say, "Slow and steady wins the race." She died in a fire.

My girlfriend went to Tokyo, and she died in the tsunami.

Since I was sad, my friend told me, "Don't worry, there's plenty more in the ocean."

I wanted to tell a joke about Jonestown.

But the punch line is too long.

When you find out your wife had a miscarriage,

So you start singing "It’s the best day ever!"

My grandma always said, "Slow and steady wins the race."

She died in a fire.

What’s the only plus for someone who burns to death?

They get a discount at the crematorium.

What’s the worst thing about being suicidal?

The school shooter will always spare you.

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

9/11.

9/11 who?

[pause] You said you’d never forget.

What’s worse than George Bush doing 9/11? Jeffrey Epstein doing nine Elevens.

I loved the Twin Towers, it's a shame my dad didn't.

Nothing bad ever happens to the Kennedys! Except that one headshot, but we don’t talk about that.

My favorite place to make a bonfire? Orphanages, of course, silly!