Tons jokes

Sans, you lazybones, get up and do something.

Sans: I am doing something.

Papyrus: Oh yeah, what?

Sans: Thinking up a skele-ton of jokes.

Papyrus: SANSSSsSsSsSssSsSSsSsSsSSsSSsSsSsS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will end you.

Sans: What, does someone not have a funny bone? Oh wait, do you have a bone to pick with me? I have 206.

So I came across a guy who was carrying a ton of clothing and makeup.

And I asked him what he is doing.

Guy: Some kawaii girl told me if I bought and brought her this crap, she would let me play with her tits.

Me: Erm... Are you a simp?

Two minutes later, the guy arrived at Kawaii Girl's house.

KG: You have it?

Guy: Yup, now can I play with them?

KG: Sure!

KG then went to her room.

Guy: Ohhhh, I know what your going to do. You're gonna call me over and you will be-

KG then held a bird cage with two birds in it.

KG: Have fun playing with them!

Guy: WHAT THE FU-

Q: How much does a skeleton weigh?

A: A skele-TON.

You heard a conversation between Sans and Papyrus:

Sans: "Sub bro."

Papyrus: "DON'T 'SUB' ME BROTHER! YOU STILL DIDN'T REDINTEGRATE YOUR PUZZLES!"

Sans: "Easy bro, I have done a ton of work today."

Sans: "A skele-ton."

(Drum effect)

Papyrus: "OH MY GOD SANS!"

What makes a skeleton laugh?

When you tickle his funny bone with a skele-TON of jokes!

Heh.

What does a skeleton say when it has a lot of stuff?

"I have a skele-TON of stuff to do."

I never liked unnatural adult stars with implants and face surgeries because they look photoshopped, and they always need a ton of lube to get into due to how plastic they are.

I love it when cancer hits like a ton of bricks. The best part is when it kills people.

I have 2000 pounds of one-ton soup.

I've done a skele-TON of work to think of this joke. Trust me, I've got a FEW more jokes!

Explain Bear weighs 1 ton.

This will take a ton of time.

A skele-ton.

I have said a ton of jokes in my lifetime.

But I got fired from that job.

Someone: Hey, are you a skeleton?

A skeleton: Of course, I have a SKELE-ton of fans!

I did a ton of work today, a skele-ton.

Why couldn't the button get off the couch?

Because his butt weighed a ton! (butt-ton)

I've done a ton of work today.

A SKELE-ton of work!

What do we call a skeleton who has a ton of travels?

A skele-TON!

I may not be that good with puns on this site, but I got a skele-ton of jokes. Hey, what's the matter pal, is there something crawling under your skin?

There was a Cheerio that had a job. He worked hard at it, and the boss came up and promoted him to the vice president of the Cheerios. So he needed a speech. He kept practicing and practicing and now he was thirsty. It was almost time for his speech, so he went to the drinking fountain, but there was a huge line. So he went to the lake, but he saw tons of garbage and what he thought was a cereal killer. So he found this bowl of punch, but he realized... there was no punchline.