They jokes
A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little boy says, "That’s my little red race car."
Ten minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little girl says, "That’s my little red race car garage."
So later that night, the little boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She said yes, and then they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won’t fit.
Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs up the stairs, flips on the lights and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?"
The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn’t fit, so I cut the back wheels off."
I got fired from a pickle factory for getting my finger caught in a slicer. They only gave *her* the day off with pay... unfair!
Why were the victims of 9/11 so mad?
Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got was a plane.
What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? They are both empty from the neck up.
Do you like tree jokes? Because they leaf me in tears!
Do you like tree jokes? Because they leaf me in tears! :3
There are sexiest women in politics.
They should be in a car showroom.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
I speak for the trees.
*Trees whisper in my ear*
They said six million wasn't enough.
Why do orphans go to church?
It’s the only place they can call someone “father.”
You know what relationships and life? They both come to an end.
Don't touch my pickles - they are very picklish.
If you ever get bored, just hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
I met a drum circle once, they were a huge hit!
If you read this, you fucked your dad and your 4-year-old sister, you sick fuck... At least wait till they are 15.
Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.
They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.
Why do orphans get the small sized chip bags?
Because they don’t have a family to share it with. 😥
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.
What does an apple and a lawyer have in common?
They both look good hanging from a tree.
I give props to pedophiles.
They always go slow in the school zones.