The jokes
Yo mama so ugly, Bloody Mary handed her an application through the mirror.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens didn't exist then.
What is the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but their flag is a big plus!
What was the last thing to go through the terrorist's mind? The detonator.
How do you confuse a fish?
Put it in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner!
Don't you hate it when you do the dishes, but then you realize it wasn't the dishes?
My kitchen was rearranged today. The tables have turned, and the steaks are higher.
What did the cops do when 600 hares escaped the zoo?
The cops had to comb the area.
These cannibal kids come running into the cave and ask their mom what's for dinner? She says, "Dad's gonna grill wieners!"
I followed the sun for a day (stood there at noon). I found myself at the same spot.
Why do orphans go to church?
Because it's the only place where they get to call him "father."
My friend looks like a homeless, thanks for the jokes.
I have a joke about death.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Think about it :)
Why do orphans go to church?
It’s the only place they can call someone “father.”
What did the computer say to the other computer? “Well, tech-ically we can’t talk.”
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he felt crummy!
By the way, could you tell me an elevator pun? I can't seem to "come up" with one myself.
How did the carpenter do on his interview? He nailed it!
Robert doesn’t see people, the man just sees meals.
What did the duck eat for lunch?
Soup and quackers.