The jokes
You know how divers jump off a cliff and land in the water well...
Emos do that too, but when they jump, they don't land in the water.
When I went to the basketball pitch, I saw a man dribbling his own balls.
I asked the emo kid if they get jealous when their phone dies.
Last Christmas was awesome, the whole family came.
What's the difference between a prisoner and an orphan?
One is loved.
Memes
What’s the best form of contraception?
Being a soccer fan.
Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."
"Do you know the difference between wallpaper and toilet paper?" Replies, "No." "Gross!"
I'm a pilot and my boss told me to fly people to New York, so I flew them to New York and hit the towers. That was a tragic story.
How is an emo kid’s wrist like Pink Floyd?
It’s all shitty until you reach the final cut.
I'm back and wearing dead whites who are killing whites from Eastern Europe on me. Shout out my boy russia and Ukraine, they all are evil just like USA and China and the rest of the west!
What do you call a blonde in the freezer?
Her parents named her Jessica, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
I saw a kid sitting on the curb and I asked him, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" "You're parents did."
What's the best finger for fingering A minor?
Why were the Twin Towers angry?
Because they ordered pepperoni pizza, and all they got was plane.
Why do New Zealanders have sex with sheep on the edge of cliffs? They push back harder.
Do you know what the equivalent to hell is these days?
1. Listening to your teacher.
2. Not having your phone/game/TV.
3. Not having nicotine.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
What's the difference between a dad and an Emo?
They both don't last a while.
Your mama is so funny looking that when the doctor called her, he said, "Never visit me again. I hope you die!"