The jokes
Why did the chicken kill himself?
To get to the other side.
Why did the orphan call her boyfriend "daddy"?
Because she wanted that D.
Why did Stephen Hawking go to Hell?
He couldn't get up the stairway to Heaven.
What is the bus?
What do you call security outside a Samsung store?
Guardians of the Galaxy.
Memes
Why did the little boy cry?
He had a frog nailed to his face and stapled to each of his fins. The frogs were his personal molesters.
What did the sweet potato say to the potato when he was told to hurry?
I yam.
The one by die.
Q. What did one Iron atom say to the other Iron atom?
A. "We're in the Matrix."
Random kid: Yo mama so stupid that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Orphan: What's a mama?
Random kid: *shook*
How do you fit 27 New Zealand tourists in a 15-seater bus?
Simple. All in the ashtray.
What is a monkey’s 🐒 favorite dance move?
The banana 🍌 split.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find a way home.
I'm so poor that when people come over to my house, I come out the window and say, "Ding Dong!"
Why were the cherries 🍒 crying?
Because their parents were in a jam.
Why was the giraffe late to work?
Because it got caught in a giraffic jam.
Did you hear about the guy who invented the first knock knock joke?
He won the No Bell Prize!
I didn't trip and fall... I attacked the floor, and I believe I am winning :3
Why is my dick like a balloon?
The more you blow it, the bigger it gets.
Why did the stoner cross the road?
He got so wasted, he thought he was a chicken.