The jokes

The only thing flat earthers have to fear...

... is a sphere itself.

What pizza did the Twin Towers order?

A plain one.

Yo mama is so fat, she wakes up on both sides of the bed.

Today, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the residents if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.

My parents are the worst.

Do you get jealous of your clothes when they hang from the line?

9/11 jokes are the bomb.

I ate the Emo Emo no Mi from One Piece. It gave me the powers of black hair, depression, and suicidal thoughts.

It's not funny to joke about orphans. Without any education, they'd never understand what the jokes mean.

If you want to get mental damage, visit the site:

https://schlechtewitze.com

Alfonso's mom is so fat that she stepped on the scale and the doctor said, "Oh shit, that's my phone number!"

How many brain cells does a pregnant blonde have?

Two, one for her and one for the baby.

The woman saw a cute lookin' cop. She had pulled up right next to him and said, "Hey, can I get your number?" He said, "Yeah, it's 911," and drove off.

What did the panther say at the Poker Party? "I would be lion if I said I was a cheetah."

I realized that a really bad joke and my life are the exact same thing.

Me: Stepping on a scale to weigh myself.

Everyone else in the minefield...

The closest thing in a depressed person's life is a knife and his/her throat.

I've always been suicidal. Some might say, "Why haven't I actually done the act?" I'll just say, well, I hate myself too much so I thought I'd stay around for the punishment of staying alive.

So, there was this girl on the street that had no arms or legs, that said "Hey sir, I've never been fucked before, will you do the honors and fuck me?" So, I threw her in the ocean and said "Well, your fucked now."

Why did the skeleton want a friend? He was feeling bonely.

My mom said don't fuck whores.

So I kicked my step sis out the house.