The jokes
A king ordered to execute a gay man.
The gay man came and said, "Please don't behead me, have pity!" The king replied, "I will have pity because I will impale you, let you enjoy your last moments."
How does the non binary kill white en Amy?
They/them.
Yo momma so queer that she thinks Paige Stawicki will be the first female in the NHL.
A Roman went to the bar and he held up two fingers and said, "Can I have five drinks, please?"
Why can’t USA and England play chess?
The USA has no towers, and England doesn’t have a queen.
Why did the duck cross the road to get to his quack dealer?
Guy and Girl are in the shower talking to each other.
Guy: Let's drop the soap.
Girl: Let's do it!
Holy cow!
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?”
“Yeah,” the other cow says. “Makes me glad I’m a penguin.”
Yo mama so ugly that when the Kool-Aid Man busted through her wall, he said, “Oh no!”
Why the fuck is this guy calling me a crying bitch?
See, this is the best thing about no such thing as vampires because I'd be the first person to say drinks are on me.
I was watching The Perfect Murder with my boyfriend. It was a good movie, but the weird thing was that my boyfriend was taking notes throughout the whole movie.
Why is the gay kid gay?
Because he likes men.
Pop in the toilet.
Had to go to the barbers just to get your hairline sorted.
Your hairline is so bad it was used as the Starbucks logo!
Yo mama so ugly when she looked in the mirror, her reflection threw up and ran away.
"Yo mama so fat when she got buried it took them all the trees on Earth for her coffin."
Yo mama is so strict that in The Outsiders, she was Darry.
Yo mama is so ugly that not even the Socs wanted to jump her.