The jokes
Yo mama so ugly when she looked in the mirror, her reflection threw up and ran away.
"Yo mama so fat when she got buried it took them all the trees on Earth for her coffin."
Yo mama is so strict that in The Outsiders, she was Darry.
Yo mama is so ugly that not even the Socs wanted to jump her.
Blud is so old he pre-ordered the Torah.
The only thing running in THIS family’s your big ass mouth! Oh, I’d better shut up, or Big Bertha’s gonna confuse my head for a burger!
Why did the disabled kid cross the road?
(Why?)
He can't.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ruff ruff.
Ruff ruff who?
Let the dogs out.
Why did Stephen Hawking die so soon?
Because his misses bought the wrong batteries.
My plants in my garden are like the Twin Towers; neither of them fell, just the flowers.
Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.
What do you call the fighters with an extra chromosome?
Downy unstopables.
Your mama is so fat that when she went to the scale, it said, "No elephants allowed!"
Yo mama so fat that when she went on the scale, it showed her phone number.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
Your hairline so back that back in the day of your hairline, Burger King was called "Burger Prince."
The neighbor’s children challenged me to a water fight.
I’m just checking my Facebook quickly before the kettle boils.
The doctor said I would make it, but then Spider-Man came in holding a PS5.
What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?
If you want a female prostitute to be a carpet muncher, you have to give her money.
I'm dyslexic. My sister was reading, "What's the book?" I asked. She showed me the cover. "You reading 'The Scared Bull'?" I asked. She started laughing. "No, 'The Sacred Bull'!"