The jokes
Family is precious, so you have to keep them away from the sunlight.
Yesterday a woman stabbed me, so I stabbed her back. Then I realized she was the vaccine woman.
Why did the chicken cross the road to Popeyes Chicken?
It wanted to pop some chicken eyes...
Your Mom is so friking fat, that when she ripped her pants and went to the seamster, they said, "We don't sew curtains!"
Why does Apple logo depict 1 byte in the 21st century?
Are you the Lusitania 'cause I wanna fire a torpedo inside you?
What did the fish say to the beach?
"Long tide, no see!"
My dad seen RuPaul's Drag Race?
Asked when will they do up the cars!
My mom once told me to spread positivity across the world, so I did.
I spread Covid across the globe because I tested positive :D
My gf told me I have to be more in touch with my feminine side, so I crashed the car.
My parents used to make me and my siblings apologize to the ground when we stomped.
If I had done "it," I would have gotten SO many apologies.
Listen, if my mom sees me on Roblox at 3 a.m., she said she would bang my head against the keyboardndfndfnnckvnksdvknkdsfnvbfw.
What did the pen say to the pencil?
The pen said, "You're pointy."
I hope you forget your password to something, only to send something to an email that you also forgot the password to.
The numbers 19 and 20 got into a fight. 21!
DB: I'm the only shotgun with more than 1 barrel!
Lancaster: Are you sure about that?
DB: huh?
Lancaster: I have 4 barrels!
DB: WHAT!?
Penta Barrel: I got 5!
DB: *insert becoming uncanny*
Dual Hexagon shotgun: I got 12!
The others: HOW!?
*and that's how an argument started.*
Why did the Italian cross the road?
C'era un uliveto.
Your mama's so ugly, when she looked in the mirror, it said, "Viewer discretion advised!"
Osama bin Laden back from the dead!!! 💣💣💣💥💥💥🔥🔥🔥🌇
There were three women, one was curvy in all the right places, one was skinny but had a booty on her, and last but not least there’s one that has a BBL. Then comes in a famous rapper, guess which one he picked???