That jokes
My friend broke his tie. That's a tie breaker.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese. Okay, I can't do this anymore.
There was a woman named Sally. She loved to have sex with other people. One time, she had sex with me. I noticed her bra size was 69 (+69). That is fucking big!
Ok, then when her partner was pissing, he told her she should call the doctor. So she dialed 2063512000 (+2000) and called the doctor. The office was on 51st street ave NE (+51). Holy shit, the doctor said! The boots were so big that she had to take 8 pills (x 8). The next morning, she was ________.
69 + 51 + 2000 x 8 = 16120
58008 (flip calculator)
Boobless.
That is not a joke hahahahhaha.
A man gets kicked out of police camp after writing "Who's that Pokémon?" next to all of the chalk outlines.
Did you know that French fries aren't from France? They're cooked in Greece.
One day, there was an ugly barnacle. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end!
I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.
(This isn't really a joke btw anyway.) SpongeBob, me boy, ye ruptured me intestines with that massive c*ck of yours, agahgahagahagahagah!
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
Nobody likes that joke.
A duck walks into a bar and says, "Got any bread?"
The bartender says, "No bread here."
And then the duck says, "Got any bread?"
And the bartender says, "Didn't I just f***ing say that there was no bread here?"
And the duck says, "Got any bread?!"
And the bartender says, "You stupid duck! Or should I say d***? There's no bread here. Don't make me say that again, or I'll pin you to the wall with a nail."
So the duck says, "Got any nails?"
And then the bartender looks surprised, and says, "Of course I've got f***ing nails. Can't you see them?"
And the duck says, "Got any bread?"
And the bartender throws the duck out of the bar.
Why are there no Olympics in Mexico? Because everyone from Mexico that can run, jump, and swim is already over the border.
What do you call an animal that smells?
A smelly-phant.
That joke is really not funny.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
Nobody finds that one funny.
Why did the mummy leave his tomb after 3000 years?
Because he thought he was old enough to leave home.
That is one of the very, very, very, very, VERY WORST jokes ever.
As a doctor myself, that nurse was very slow, she tested my patience!
What do you call a dog that is part pug, part poodle, and part cup? A muggle! 🤠🤠🤠🤠🥴
A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little boy says, "That’s my little red race car."
Ten minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little girl says, "That’s my little red race car garage."
So later that night, the little boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She said yes, and then they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won’t fit.
Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs up the stairs, flips on the lights and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?"
The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn’t fit, so I cut the back wheels off."
This Fairy Tail shirt is only $9.99! Guess you can say that's a fair retail.
Boy: I'm dead.
Girl: Is that why you're so ugly?
Boy: No, I was just born this way.