Superhero jokes
What's a spider-man’s dream job? Web developer.
What is an orphan's favorite movie? Hint, not Home Alone. It's actually Batman, 'cause they are 50% the same as him.
Why was the Human Torch arrested?
He had firearms.
Orphan: "I want to be a superhero."
Me: "You should be Batman."
Also me: *starts laughing* because Batman doesn't have parents...
What happens when Batman sees Catwoman?
The Dark Knight Rises.
Where does the Batman go to pee?
The Batroom.
Why did Peter Parker take Gwen Stacy to an orthopedist?
Because her neck was killing her.
Why do people want to jump off buildings?
Because they want to become Superman.
I asked the orphan if he wanted to watch all the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies with me, and he started crying.
I asked my orphan friend what his movie is, he said "Spiderman: No Way Home." I said, "Probably because it's so relatable, right?" He started crying. I don't know why.
Why can't a homeless person be in "The Boys?"
Because he would have beef with Homelander.
Why is Homelander an orphan's favorite superhero?
Because they can actually land a home.
Q: What’s the difference between Black Panther and Batman?
A: Batman “returns.”
If someone with a lisp dropped a hammer on their foot, would they be Thor?
When Ant-Man is the size of an atom, how can he breathe?
What is Thanos's favorite video game?
Pokémon Snap.
Denki: Hey Mineta, I have a joke.
Mineta: ...go on...
Denki: Ochako's booty.
Mineta: I don't get it?
Denki: Exactly.
Mineta: *cries T_T*
What do you call it when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
I was making fun of an orphan, then I realized he tracked me down. I made a bad decision. He was Batman!
Warner Brothers have made a new Superman movie with Superman being black.
This new Superman's nickname is the "Man of Steel" but it's spelled s-t-e-a-l.