Suicide

Suicide Jokes

Laugh

When a person yells, just laugh and remember that they can’t hurt what’s already dead.

Mirror

You're so ugly that if you looked in the mirror, you would walk into the light.

Hitler

Why did Hitler kill himself? He knew the war was over at the beginning.

Bleach

What's a suicidal person's favorite drink?

The depressay expressay.

Just kidding, bleach!

Death

You have five seconds to kill me. 1... 2... 3... 4... Thank you. I can rest now. WAIT, HOW AM I TALKING?????????????????????

Hangman

What is an emo's most hated game? Hangman.

Because it's rubbing it in their face that they can't hang themselves.

Emo

If you drop an emo and a piece of paper out of a tree, you know what will hit the floor first? The paper, because the rope will stop the emo.

Tree

One time Little Johnny saw someone in his yard tying a rope to a tree, and he moved the stool and the tree broke. Little Johnny screamed, "HAHA! You're skinny enough to break the tree!"

Emo

If an emo and a leaf are in a tree, which one will fall first?

Answer: The leaf. The rope saved the emo.

Rape

Rape victim: I want to die.

Man: Hang in there.

Rape victim: That's what I'll do, I'll hang myself.

Orphan

An orphan was shocked, he called the ambulance. If he forgot he's suicidal, he quickly hung up.

Emo

What do you call an emo dating another emo?

The suicide duo.

Orphan

What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.

Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.

Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.