Spoon Jokes

What did the pencil say to the piece of paper? You FLAT.

What did the spoon say to the pancake batter? You THICK.

Me: Do you take milk before cereal, or cereal before milk?

The adult person I asked: Cereal?

Me: I take the bowl first! What do you do? Do you just pour everything on the table and then eat it?

The person: Yes.

Me: WHAT?!!!??!!

When you are being spoon-fed and your mum says, "Here comes the airplane."

Your mom is so stupid that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

Your mom is so fat that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

Anyone here a spoon?

How is your cereal? Oh, wait.

One day, I'm going to Malta to a big hotel. In the morning, I go down to eat breakfast. I tell the waitress I want two pieces of toast. She brings me only one piece. I tell her I want a piece. She says, "Go to the toilet." I say, "You don't understand. I want a piece on my plate." She says, "You better not piss on your plate, you son of a bitch." I don't even know the lady, and she calls me a son of a bitch.

I don't need this shit!!

Later, I go to eat at the big restaurant. The waitress brings me a spoon and a knife, but no fork. I tell her I wanted a fork. She tells me everyone wanna fuck. I say, "You don't understand, I want a fork on my table." She says, "You better not fuck on the table, you son of a bitch." I don't even know the lady, and she calls me a son of a bitch.

I don't need this shit!

So, I go back to my room in a hotel, and there are no sheets on the bed. I call the manager and tell him I want a sheet. He tells me, go to the toilet. I say, "You don't understand, I want a sheet on my bed." He says, "You better not shit on my bed, you son of a bitch."

I go to the checkout, and the man at the desk says, 'Peace on you.' I say, 'Piss on you too, you son of a bitch. I'm going back to Italia. Arrivederci!'

I don't need this shit!

Moral of the story, don't go to Australia with a Korean accent.

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw spoons at her.

What is the difference between me and the Twin Towers?

My mom was only airplane feeding me a spoon.

Yo momma so dumb, when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon.

Yo mama so fat... she brought a spoon... to the SUPER BOOOOOOWL! YEAHHHHHHH!!!!!

Yo mama so stupid, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

Your mama is so fat, when her husband said, "Let's go to the Super Bowl," she bought a spoon.

Your mom is so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

Your mum is so fat that she took a spoon to the supercool.

Yo mama so stupid, she went to the Super Bowl with a spoon!

How do you name a Chinese person?

You drop a metal spoon on a tile floor.

How do you cook macaroni? With a shark-spoon-a-rooni!

Jomama so dumb, she brung a spoon to the Super Bowl.