SOS jokes

You're so ugly that when your mama had you, she tried to give you away, but there was nowhere to give you.

Your mama's so fat that when she went to space, there was no space left.

Your mama's so ugly that when she looks in the mirror, you can see Micah.

You're so full of shit that the toilet's jealous.

What did the mom say when her child came out?

"The head was so big!"

Your forehead so big you got to take Tylenol pills, big like chocolate chip cookies.

Bully: I'm going to hurt you so bad.

You: Well, your IQ is the same amount of teeth I'm about to knock out, so... you're so dumb that you don't even know how to do that.

And your IQ is 5.

And Mary said God had given her a child, so Joseph went and joined Fathers For Justice.

You're at a funeral. Your mum says be quiet, so you snigger at the body and say, "Bye forever, bitch."

Popcorn means Photo-Oxidant formation by Plant-emitted Compounds and OH Radicals in Northeastern Germany.

HO means a woman, in particular one who has many casual fricking encounters or relationships. So basically, popcorn is a woman in plant based frick chamber in a nazi camp.

I'm so confused. Who is Gwen? The only Gwen I can think of is the one from Spiderman. 😂

Did you hear about the crime in the parking garage? It was wrong on so many levels.

One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."

I remember the time Gordon Ramsay did an African food episode... too bad it was so short he couldn’t find any.

What happened to the chicken after he died? He did not say anything, so I don't know.

My therapist told me time heals all wounds, so I stabbed him. Now we wait.

Mr. Smith lived in an apartment. In the apartment, he went to the elevator and went to the 16th floor. Then he went to the 21st floor by 5 stairs every morning. Why did he do that?

Because he was too short! So he pressed the highest button he could and walked to his apartment.

Yo mama so fat that if we cut her open, we could stop world hunger.

I remember last year all these bitches called me lame so I stopped the simping and pretended I was gay, now I think they're all fucking with me.

I'm an LGBTQ imposter got cut last year know I've made the roster and you may think I'm a monster. I'm just just tryna see some titties.

Think about you are so fucking high that you are walking to a lift and inside the lift are stairs. 🤣🤣🤣🤣