SOS Jokes

One twin tower had a girlfriend. The other twin tower had the same girlfriend, so they both went down.

Yo mama is so ugly that when Santa came to the house and saw a picture of her, he died.

What's so special about Palestinian sex dolls?

They blow themselves up.

Why are Palestinian boys so eager to grow a beard?

So they can use their mum's ID to get in the club.

As a straight son, one day I asked my mom, "Have you ever quit something that you did before?" My mom said, "No, I never quit anything." So I asked my when you give a blow job you ever spit, then my mom said, "What did I say? Quitters are for spitters."

A four-panel image with three yellow smiley faces and a screenshot of a Wikipedia article. The first smiley face is smiling with two thumbs up and says 'hey so um'. The second smiley face is smiling and says 'there's this girl'. The third smiley face is turned upside down and says 'and um'. The fourth panel is a screenshot from Wikipedia about 'The Game (mind game)'. The text reads: "The Game is a mental game where the objective is to avoid thinking about The Game itself. Thinking about The Game constitutes a loss, which must be announced each time it occurs. It is impossible to win most versions."

Yo mama so short that when she tried to sniff meth, she couldn’t get high.

Your hairline is so far back, just like your dad is from you.

Your hairline is so far back it looks like it's been slapped up by Will Smith.

Why are gay dudes so rude?

Because they're fucking assholes.

Your hairline is so long The Rock complimented it!

Your dad is so fat that when he walks past the TV, I miss three episodes of South Park.

Your mom is so stupid that she thought LGBTQ was a sandwich.

What do you do to a deaf girl after you’re done fucking her?

Break her fingers so she can’t tell anyone.

You’re so fine that my zipper is falling for you.

"Stupidity isn’t a crime, so you’re free to go."

Why does your grandma like gardening so much?

Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees.

Your hairline is so long, people call it "The Natural Disaster!"

I’ve been munching away on these new Tic Tacs recently and honestly, they are really good.

It’s a little strange how they came in a bottle labeled “Ibuprofen” though, and really, I’m starting to feel a little sick. The bottle’s almost empty though, so it’s time to get some more!