SOS jokes

Yo mama so fat, her belly enters the room 10 minutes before she does.

You are so ugly, when the devil saw you, he said, "Jesus Christ!"

Joe mama so fat, when she stepped on a scale it said "to be continued."

Joe Mama so weird, she cut her hair in a squiggly diggly haircut.

Why are orphans so bad at baseball?

Because they don't know where home is.

Your mama is so ugly, she summoned Bloody Mary.

She handed her an application through the mirror.

Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.

I went to visit my childhood home. I asked the owners if I could come in for some nostalgic memories. They said no and slammed the door on me. My parents are so mean.

Your hairline is so big it took your mom a map to find it.

My sister told me only onions make you cry, so I always hit her back when she hit me, but I hit her with a shoe only to catch her cry.

Girl, you are so ugly that when you look in the mirror, it shatters, more than your relationship.

Yo mama so fat, when she went on the elevator, it went down.

Today, a kid in a wheelchair was rolling around the class to get away from this one annoying kid, so I told him, "Brayden, just get up and walk away."

Your hairline goes so far back that it had dinner with Jesus.

Why have there been so many deaths around the world?

Trees and ropes.

What’s the difference between your boyfriend and a condom?

A. Condoms have evolved. They’re not so thick and insensitive anymore.

I got fired my first day at the bank. This old lady told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Jack and Jill wanted some pills.

So they went to the dealer; he saw they were kids and said, "Fuck this shit," then Jack rocked his ass and took all the good shit except birth control pills.

Your forehead's so big that I was tryna figure out if that was you or the moon.

Why did the orphan grow up to be a priest?

So he could be called Father Les.