SOS jokes

Alabama gene pools are so shallow, when they freeze over, it's just snow.

Joe mama so fat, hello kitty said goodbye.

Your forehead is so big, a whole jungle grew on it.

Yo mama is so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

I know the voices in my head aren't real, but man, do they have some good ideas.

My mom asked me if I was okay, so I replied, "I will be," and jumped out the window!

Yo mama so fat that Will Smith could slap her from a mile away.

I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.

Yo mama is so fat that I could write 3 paragraphs, and she still wouldn’t fit.

Yo mama so ugly, when she went to unlock her phone with her face, it said, "disconnected."

I have an exam next week, so I called my ex and asked if she had any cheating tips.

Your mom is so ugly, she made the devil go to church.

Your forehead is so big, I bet your dreams are in IMAX.

Yo mama so old when she farts, dust comes out.

So yesterday, I was at an orphanage, harassing children by twerking at them.

They burst into tears.

I was worried that they would call their mom, well... um... I got away.

Don’t criticize someone until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes.

So, when you criticize them, they won’t be able to hear you from that far away. Plus, you’ll have their shoes.

Person 1: “Hey, today was great!”

Person 2: “What happened?”

Person 1: “I ran into my ex today.”

Person 2: “What’s so great about that?”

Person 1: “I was in my car.”

Yo mama is so old, she is the founder of the pyramid of Egypt.

Yo, hairline been missing so badly that the police had to put up a wanted poster for it!

You need to eat makeup on the inside because, friend, you're so ugly and you're not even pretty on the outside.