Someone jokes

Day

  • One day, Little Susie got her monthly bleeding for the first time in her life.

    Not quite certain what was happening, and somewhat frightened, she decided to tell Little Johnny. Little Susie dropped her panties and showed Little Johnny what was happening.

    Little Johnny's eyes opened wide in amazement. "You know," he said, "I'm not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"

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  • Bastard

  • How to treat someone who’s lesbian, gay, queer, transgender or bisexual?

    The same way that you would treat anybody else, you homophobic bastard.

    Guy

  • Hey guys, Billy has this weird disability where when he has sex with someone, he says their name really loud.

    Billy: Hey guys, I just got back from my DADS!!

    Wait, what Billy?

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  • Stripper

  • How do men like their women? Striped.

    How does a priest like their children? Clean.

    Why are most orphans strippers? They want to call someone mommy or daddy.

    What is the difference between a stripper and candy? None. But they like it when you take the wrapper off.

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  • Mountain

  • Why did Shawn suddenly fly to Mount Everest, leaving behind friends, family, and food?

    Someone told him that "Shelby"'s coming 'round the mountain.

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  • Orphan

  • Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.

    Ass

  • *At A Funeral For Someone Who Jumped Off A Building* Victim's Mom: "I wonder what was the last thing that went through his head..."

    Me: "Honestly... Probably his ass."

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  • Rape

  • If raping someone is sexual harassment, then is raping a rapist inverted harassment?

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  • Conductor

  • A conductor was conducting a song. At the end, he threw his conductor's stick and killed someone. He was put to the electric chair, but nothing happened. They asked why he didn't die, and he replied, "I'm a bad conductor."

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  • Violence

  • A man was hitting a woman with his d*ck. Someone ran up to the man and said, "That's domestic violence!" The man replied with, "No, it's not domestic violence, it's dumbass-d*ck violence!"

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  • Life

  • All my life I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to achieve something.

    Now, after messing up my life at every possible chance, I finally realize that what I really want is to have been someone after following through with one thing.

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  • Orphan

  • Orphan jokes protest. Anonymous.

    Orphan jokes are just funny so stop trying to ruin our fun!

    Comments:

    Gwen: Stop! It is not funny. Orphans are just out their cold, weak, and need someone! And the jokes are not funny!

    Shut up: Shut up!

    Liv: Gwen stop!!

    Gwen: SHUT UP BITCH!!!!!!!!!