Someone jokes

Why did Shawn suddenly fly to Mount Everest, leaving behind friends, family, and food?

Someone told him that "Shelby"'s coming 'round the mountain.

Someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.

Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.

If raping someone is sexual harassment, then is raping a rapist inverted harassment?

Why do orphans want to be gay?

So they have someone to call "Daddy."

Why do orphans like to go to church?

Because they can finally call someone "father!"

Why do orphan girls become prostitutes?

So they can call someone "daddy."

A conductor was conducting a song. At the end, he threw his conductor's stick and killed someone. He was put to the electric chair, but nothing happened. They asked why he didn't die, and he replied, "I'm a bad conductor."

*At A Funeral For Someone Who Jumped Off A Building* Victim's Mom: "I wonder what was the last thing that went through his head..."

Me: "Honestly... Probably his ass."

How do you know someone has Down syndrome?

They're doing better than you.

A man was hitting a woman with his d*ck. Someone ran up to the man and said, "That's domestic violence!" The man replied with, "No, it's not domestic violence, it's dumbass-d*ck violence!"

All my life I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to achieve something.

Now, after messing up my life at every possible chance, I finally realize that what I really want is to have been someone after following through with one thing.

Someone dies.

Orphan jokes protest. Anonymous.

Orphan jokes are just funny so stop trying to ruin our fun!

Comments:

Gwen: Stop! It is not funny. Orphans are just out their cold, weak, and need someone! And the jokes are not funny!

Shut up: Shut up!

Liv: Gwen stop!!

Gwen: SHUT UP BITCH!!!!!!!!!

I asked for emotional support. They handed me a mirror and said, "Talk to someone who cares."

If you go to someone's house and see the flag of the former Soviet Union hanging on the wall,

that's a big red flag!

What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?

Someone didn’t pull it out in time.

Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?

Sans: What do you call them?

Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!

What did the Indian say when he bumped into someone else?

"Sari."

Ask someone to call you a bitch. When they do, tell them, "Bitches do as they are told!"