Snack jokes
Spell "Ihop," and then say, "'Ness, I ate your peanuts!"
What do we want? A cure for obesity.
When do we want it? After lunch.
Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was assaulted.
What do you call a nacho that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese.
Why can't a Chinese kid play baseball?
They ate the bat!
Why do orphans hate big bags of chips?
Because they are family sized :,)
Why can't the orphan eat Doritos?
They were all family sized.
Does anyone else here eat pretzels with Nutella? It tastes AMAZINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
What is six inches, has nuts, and is hard?
A sinkers bar.
What is an orphan's least favorite snack?
"Dots HOMESTYLE Pretzels!"
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
Because they eat the bat.
What's the best part of being an orphan?
All the chips and candy bars are family sized.
Hansume cheetah e Cel Cheetos?
Life is like a raisin cookie you expected to be chocolate.
Disappointing.
Daughter: Mommy?
Mom: Hey.
Daughter: What kind of kids do they use to make Sour Patch Kids?
Mom: They don’t use kids to make Sour Patch Kids.
Daughter: Oh, that’s why the ones I made taste kind of funny...
As an orphan, every bag of chips is family size.
One day, little Johnny was playing with his toys and looked out the window. He saw the neighbor's kid laying face-first in the grass, not breathing.
Little Johnny continued to shoot his nerf gun at the neighbor's big booty cheeks. No movement at all. After little Johnny went to get a snack, he looked out the window again and the kid was gone.
Little Johnny went to the neighbors and said, "I'm sorry to hear that your child has gone missing."
What is a computer's favorite snack? Cookies!
Boys eat Frito Bandito, but men eat Guido Bandito.
Cheese, gimme cheese!
(inspired by a friend)