Sister jokes
I took my sister and cousin to a sleepover with lil Diddy, who my dad's friend has connections with.
I think the experience went fine, but they were traumatized. We got what we wanted.
My sister is so stupid, she thought LBJ was Spanish for blowjob.
What is it about sisters who argue?
Knock, knock.
Who is there?
Deez.
Deez who?
Deez nuts!
Dr. Seuss dark jokes.
Hey there little mister, I'm dating your sister!
Dentist: Open up, sir.
Me: So... I hate my life, my family, my sisters, my dog, my cat, and I tried to take a bath with my toaster, but my dog took it. That's why I hate my dog. And my cat died trying to chew my rope; it choked... Yea.
Dentist: I... meant your mouth... so I can clean your teeth.
Me: :O Ohhhh, my bad.
Dentist: Do you need help??
Me: Yep.
Dentist: ...
Me: ....
My sister's pregnant, I'm gonna be a dad!
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin."
Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night."
Kid 1: "As if."
Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister."
Kid 1: "I don't have a sister."
Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."
My sister's friends are hilarious, like seriously, haha.
How can you tell if your sister is on her period?
Your father's dick tastes funny.
My sister beat me in a race. She gave me a raspberry. I was bitter.
I asked my sister to get me a cup of fruit punch. I realized she was taking a bit so I walk to the kitchen and noticed that she spilled it on herself. I asked her, "How did you do that?" but there was no response.
What did the brother cell say when the sister cell stepped on his foot? Ow, mitosis! (my toe, sis)
My stepsister is a big titty goth. Should I tap that?
What did the skeleton say to his dog at dinner time? Bone appétit!
Brian has a crush on a cute girl, Sally, from school, so he goes and tells his dad about her, and he says, "Sorry, son, you can't like her; she is your sister." So Brian is okay with it, and he starts to like another girl, Madison, and he goes up to his dad and says, "I have a crush on this girl, Madison," and again the dad goes, "Oh, sorry, son, you can't like any girl in school; they are all your sisters." So he goes crying to his mom and says, "Dad said I can't like any girl because they are all my sisters," and the mom goes, "Oh, it's okay; you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad."
My dad called me as I said I shit in my sister's mouth. Impossible? Nope.
My sister looks like Santa Claus.
"You are so pretty?"
"No, too many people!"
My sister is so dumb, she genuinely spent lockdown studying for a COVID test.
A girl tried 77.34 (77.34) times to think of a word opposite of BYE. Then her brother divided the word BYE. 77.34 divided by 100. TRY IT!!