Showdown jokes

Alien vs Predator.

Cosby vs E.T.

I asked my boyfriend who his favorite motivational speaker was. He said Andrew Tate. I told him the BEST motivational speaker was Stephen Hawking.

I asked a man if I was the fastest gun in the west. He said my 17 wasn't good enough. After that, a lot of lead went into his head.

A shark can swim faster than me, but I can run faster than a shark.

So in a triathlon, it would all come down to whoever can ride a bike the fastest.

Beer Bottle: You break me, you get one year of bad luck!

Mirror: You kiddin' me? You break me, then y'all get seven years of bad luck!

Condom: Hahaha... (Condom walks off laughing)

I was Gandalf the Grey.

But now, after just three washes...

Everyone is talking about Head and Shoulders, and that if he never had a shower, his batteries would have got wet.

Nobody:

The Vietcong when America lands on their beaches:

tReE pOwErS aCtIvAtE!

Bleach!

Did you know Kurt had dandruff?

Found his head and shoulders behind the couch.