Shooter jokes
What do a school shooter and a person with gum have in common?
One's the pull it out everyone wants to be their friend.
I don’t like to tell school shooter jokes because they are usually aimed at a younger audience.
What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common?
They both like to dump their loads into little kids.
What's a school shooter's favorite flower?
Columbine.
Why was the kid not able to cross the hallway?
Answer: The school shooter already shot him in the middle of the hallway.
When the school shooter throws a smoke bomb into the classroom, and the autistic kid thinks it's a dance party.
What do you call a circus show? A school shooter.
When a school shooter walks to the intercom and plays Pumped Up Kicks.
"Hippity hoppity, the school shooter spotted me."
This isn't a joke, just an American back-to-school list.
1. Pencils
2. Binders
3. Paper
4. Pencil sharpener.
What, did you think I was going to make a school shooter joke?
We don't have school shooters; we have special ed breeches.
When the school shooter is just about to leave your classroom, and you think you're in the clear, but the Down syndrome kid says, "Goodbye."
I wanted to solve teen suicide, so I shot up a middle school.
What is a school shooter's favorite animal?
A Desert Eagle.
A student was peeking in on a 10/10 chick, and the guy was about to nut.
The school shooter patted his back and told him to leave his corpses alone.
Don't make Iran jokes. My mom died by a rocket launcher. She was the best sharp shooter in the Iranian army.
The Columbine High School basketball team hasn't been the same since they lost their two best shooters.
A man shoots up a school and then fakes his own death. He then later returns to shoot up the same school. He repeats the process a few times until the police catch him. When they ask why he did it, he replied, "I wondered when you would check if I was still breathing."
A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat. He is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with, "What do you mean? I already did it." Then the police ran back to the school to apprehend the other people he was planning it with. The cops busted in through the doors, which caused a smoke trap to go off, which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear, the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles, 4 per pole. Back at the station, holding the kid being apprehended, the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said, "Aww, it pays to be lazy!"
So there was a school shooting in Florida. Why didn't the shooter just go to Disney?.......sorry, I just work there and I'm trying to get people to come on down.