Shes jokes

Yo mama so hairy that she got a haircut and lost 47 pounds.

I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... She died of hearing aids.

I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.

Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.

Did you know Helen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard?

No, and neither did she.

Your mama so fat she’s on both sides of the family.

Your hairline goes back further than when my gran died, and she was buried 6 foot under.

One late night, my wife caught me standing in front of the freezer.

She asked me, "What are you doing?"

I replied, "I'm making a pink yeti."

She asked, "What does that mean?"

I said, "I left our kid in the freezer for a couple hours."

Yo mama so fat, when she play a game, everybody lags.

The woman became extremely uncomfortable with the man she had just met. While he lay beside her, romantically kissing and stroking her neck he whispered, “I called the number you gave me at the bar tonight. Someone named Alvin answered who has never heard of you.”

Your mama so fat when she sits on the toilet it sings, "ABC, 123, get your fat ass off of me!"

Why does Helen Keller use her left hand to play with herself?

So she can moan with her right hand.

My mom bought me a car, and she called me an ungrateful b*tch because I sat in my wheelchair the whole time.

Yo mama so dumb, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept!

Why was the orphan so successful?

When they told him, "Go big or go home," he/she only had one option.

Your momma is so fat, when she chose a yellow shirt when she was on a run, the kids ran after her because they thought they missed the bus.

My sister told me she liked Medusa.

I said, "Huh?"

My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.

Your mama is so fat, when I think of her in my head, she just broke my neck.

Yo mama so fat she makes the sun look like a dwarf star!

What's white and annoying at breakfast? An avalanche.

Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She got hit by an axe.

Why did little Billy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

If she’s old enough to breed, she’s old enough for me.