Shes jokes

My friend is upset with me because I sniffed his grandmother's nickers. Not sure if it was because she was still wearing them or if it was because the whole family was watching. Either way, the rest of her funeral was really awkward.

Your mother is responsible for all the train drivers that are never ever late. She taught them all to pull out on time.

Is there a really annoying girl at your school and she's so fake? Well, say this:

Me: Hey, I have a nickname for you.

Her: Really? What?

Me: Sweet-in-low.

Her: Why?

Me: Because you're artificial.

Your mom is so fat, when she swam in the sea, Wales came up to her and said, "We are family, even now you’re fatter than me."

Yo momma so fat, when she pulled out the chair, it screamed and broke itself.

My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day. She was pulled in by a strong "currant."

My girlfriend was cheating in Uno.

She's not the only one who can play that game.

Yo mama so stupid, she starved in a grocery store!

Your mamma is so fat that she saved me a lot of money by sitting in my car when I wanted to buy a low rider.

Did you know Helen had a playhouse in her backyard? Neither did she!

"Abracadabra! Alacuzam! See that woman? She’s now a man."

"After the man got some sun, I turned this banana into a gun! Now look! I now have your phone, Apple Watch, and your credit card!"

Yo mama so stupid she thought seaweed was something fish smoke.

One day I asked my mom where kids came from. She said the man who went to the milk store.

Five years later, he came back and left again.

Yo mama is so fat that she is not wrong when she says the world revolves around her.

There was a fire at my high school when I was in Year 7.

When the local newspaper interviewed my teacher, they asked her how she was seeing the "bright side" of it.

She said, "Well, at least our new students got a warm welcome!"

54 students died that day.

Mary has a house near a forest. She lives with her bro, and she once asked, "How many trees are there?" Her bro said: "I don't know." She said: "Tree."

Yo' mama is so stupid, she couldn't find a needle in a haystack.

Yo mama so ugly, she made everybody's face fall off.

She does not wanna fuck you, and she don’t need you clapping them cheeks.

Yo mama is so ugly, she makes the Flash stop dead in his tracks.