Scare jokes
I took an hour-long shower. The German officers were looking at me kinda scared.
Your mama is so ugly, she doesn't have to flush the toilet. She already scared the shit out of it.
Why were 7, 8, and 10 scared?
Answer: 9/11, of course!
Why can’t fish play basketball?
'Cause they are scared of the net.
A man was walking home but felt tired, so took a short cut through the cemetery. He then heard a tap, tap, then out of the corner of his eye, he saw a man with a hammer hitting the tombstone. The man said, "You scared me. I thought you were a ghost." The other person mumbled, "They spelled my name wrong."
Why are New Yorkers scared of airplanes?
I tell my therapist I’m scared of the 3rd, 9th, and 15th letter of the alphabet.
Doctor: Oh, I see.
Me: Ahhhh!!!!!
Why was 6 scared of 7?
'Cause 7 8 9.
I was in a haunted house today. Nothing scared me until I reached the last room, where I saw the scariest Halloween ghost I've ever seen. He took my pens and ghosted. I was told that I saw Pristiano Penaldo and I was lucky enough to see him because he performs once in a blue moon.
When the kid in the wheelchair scares you... you wheelie scared me.
Why aren't orphans scared of getting in trouble at school?
Because they can't call their parents.
What do you call it when a man is scared in Panera Bread?
Panera dread.
Why were the Twin Towers scared at dinner?
Because their mom said, "Here comes the airplane!"
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9.
Do you know why 10 was scared? Because he was between 9/11.
Therapy - Expensive - Years of hard work - Emotionally draining - Tough to find
Screaming in the woods - Free - Immediate relief - Scares hunters enough to leave, therefore saving innocent animals - Potential to make friends with people who are also screaming in the woods.
Why was 10 scared because it was in the middle of 9/11?
I have always been scared of stairs; they're always up to something.
6, 7, and 8 are all scared of 10, but 10 is also scared. Why was 10 scared?
Because it was stuck between 9 and 11.
How do you scare a lot of people in New York?
Open a mobile hotspot named "Delta Inflight Wifi."
What are 8 people hiding in a corner because they're scared?
An octopus.