Sausage Jokes

Christopher and Tony were tempted for a beer but they only had 2 dollars each. Christopher got an idea and run away to the butcher and see if he got something good. He came back with a sausage. So they went to a pub and ordered 2 beers and 2 whiskeys. - Are you crazy?! Said Tony to Christopher. 'We don't have any money!' - Take it easy now, said Christopher. 'I have a plan.' When they finnished drink everything up christopher put the sausage through his own zipper and begged Tony to bend on his knees and take the sausage with his mouth. The bartender saw what they did and throw them out without even paying. So Christopher and Tony kept doing the same thing pub after pub after pub. After the 10th pub said Tony: I can't do this anymore. I am drunk and my knees are in too much pain to even handle the walk. - How do you think i feel? Said Christopher exhausted. ' I dropped the sausage in the 3th pub!'

Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don't have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan: he tells his friend, "We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks. But then when the bill comes, you get down and suck on the hot-dog, and it'll look like you're sucking on my dick. So then we'll get thrown out without paying, and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again."

His friend agrees, so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude's pants, go to the bar, and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, "Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!" The first guy says, "Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!"

I once auditioned to be in sausage party. I thought I filled the role well.

What does a man with 20 children do now?

Now he eats sausages even with cellophane

Why do catholic priest suck on the cock of a young boy in his parish? because it taste like a vienna sausage

What is the definition of African-American Vienna sausages? 😋 😋 😋 😋 😋 😋 😋 😋 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 💘 cocks of African-American men 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭🌭 🌭 🌭

Have you ever had a bad sausage? It's the wurst.

What is the definition of polish sausage? 🐴 🍖 horse meat

Have you ever had duck sausage? No? How bout you duck on down and get yourself some

A patient visiting his doctor asked him if he had ever laughed at a patient. The doctor said, "I have never in 25 years of practice ever laughed at a patient". Reassured, the patient drops his trousers and underpants. Immediately the doctor burst out into loud raucous laughter when he sees that the patient has a penis the size of a cocktail sausage. After about 10 minutes the doctor manages to get himself under control. Swiftly apologising he says to the patient, "Sorry about that. How can I help you?" The patient says, "Have you got any cream for it? It's swollen."