Rodent jokes

Why did the squirrel do the backstroke?

He wanted to keep his nuts dry.

What do you call a mouse that doesn't like being known about?

Anonymouse.

What do rats like on their birthday? Mice cream and cake.

What do mice eat for dinner?

Mac n Cheese.

What is a mouse's favorite movie?

"Sharpay's Fabu-mouse Adventure!"

How are a mouse and a bale of hay alike?

The cat'll eat it (the cattle eat it).

Why did the chipmunk swim on its back?

To keep its nuts dry.

What do you call mouse sneakers? Squeakers!

What would you name your pet rabbit?

Harry.

Very sad today. Found my pet mouse "Elvis" dead this morning. He was caught in a trap.

This rat did the most amazing thing ever; it was pretty radical, dude.

What did one mouse say to the other mouse when it tried to steal the cheese?

"That's nacho cheese!"

What did one squirrel say to the other squirrel?

"Stop staring at my nuts."

What is a rat's favorite dessert?

A chocolate mousse cake.

Hickory dickory dock, the mouse ran up the clock.

He finally got up there, but a bird stole his co-.

The early bird might get the worm...

But the second mouse gets the cheese.

How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two, but how they got in there's the real mystery!

How do you get a squirrel's attention? Act like a nut.

Doc: Can I help you?

Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.

Doc: When did it begin?

Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).

Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...

Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.

Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?

Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.

What does a polite mouse say?

"Cheese and thank you."