In a Catholic school cafeteria, a nun places a note in front of a pile of apples, "Only take one. God is watching." Further down the line is a pile of cookies. A little boy makes his own note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
What did the duck do when he crossed the road?
The duck jumped into a pool of ant piles! ππ
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
What do you call a pile of cheese? A cheese grater.
How did a man know his wife died?
Dishis start piling up.
Last week I went on a whale watch.
After everyone had piled onto a boat, they loaded the boat onto a trailer and drove to your house.
I just came across a pile of cash in the parking lot.
Usually I just use tissues.
Is a pile of balls
What do you call a flat cabbage?
A leaf pile.
What does "the whole pile of poops" mean?
"The whole pile of shits."
What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain.
*Breaking News!* - Apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the Coronavirus. In his house they found 1000 cans of food, 50 kilos of pasta, 80 kilos of rice, 300 toilet rolls and 50L of hand sanitiser which he had panic purchased from the supermarket and stockpiled "just in case".
The whole lot collapsed and buried him.
What do you call a chicken staring at a pile of lettuce?
A chicken sees a salad.
(Say it out loud if you don't get it!)
Why did the banana go to the doctor?because it wasnβt piling very well
what's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer?
i don't know I have both
Dad: "If they jumped off a bridge, would you?"
Tommy: "Yes, cuz there would be a body pile to break my fall!"
Hi, I was a feminist until I realised that:
A. Feminism is just a pile of dumb shit.
B. That men are actually treated unequally.
SO
we should all say sorry to the boys for pissing them off.
What's the difference between my basement and my garage?
One has a pile of babies' bodies; the other has their heads.
What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?
Kentucky Fried Children!
What's it called when you eat those same babies?
Finger Lickin' Good!
The other day a squirrel asked me for a job. I asked him, "What jobs did you have previously?"
Calmly he answered, "I am a pilot. I can pick it up from here and pile it over there. I also can fly a sign!"
"Too bad, this is a nut cannery, and we're 100% automated. We don't need anyone at this time, sorry."
"No worries, I'm totally nuts anyway. Guess I'll fly a sign across town, don't have bus fare!"
Whatβs the difference between a pile of corpses and a Mclaren P1?
I donβt have a garage
