OH jokes
Orphan: What are you doing tonight?
Me: Your mum... oh wait, you don't have one.
What did the parents say to the orphan? "Where are your parents?"
Oh... wait.
There was once a young sister who never got anything good for her birthday, and she was sick of it. So one day the girl asked for a puppy, and the parents said yes.
When she got the puppy, he was nice, but the puppy needed food every two minutes. The parents eventually got sick of it and came up with a plan. Two weeks passed and the younger and less fat sister asked where her other sister was as she wanted to play Barbies. “And also, why haven’t you been feeding the dog? He needs food, you know.” The parents only answered with “Oh! Yes, you can have a room all to yourself now. And about the puppy...he won’t need feeding for years.”
Hey girl, are you an orphan?
Oh, that’s right, I’m your daddy.
We love Russia, we do.
We love Russia, we do.
We love Russia, we do.
Oh, Russia, we love you! 🇷🇺
Oh, brother!
Guys, we gotta stop telling these jokes. They are getting out of h- oh wait no .... Continue.
Yo daddy so stupid, he threw a Father’s Day party at the orphanage.
What did the Catholic priest say to the other Catholic priest as they entered the orphanage? Let’s us prey.
I saw an orphan take a selfie... oh man, that was one alone family photo.
Oh dear, I made a backwards ray. Let's test it. I made a backwards ray, let's test it oh.
The orphans all died!!!
Oh wait, no one cares...
Their parents are all dead anyway. We are just making them happier. They get to join their parents in hell.
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?
They cry...
They scream... with joy.
"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."
Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...
Teacher: "If you're dumb, stand up."
Nobody stands up.
After some waiting, the teacher says, "Really? No one? There must be someone."
Little Johnny stands up.
"Oh, so you think you're dumb, Johnny?"
"Nah, I just feel bad that you're standing alone."
A child with cancer: "I want to be like you when I grow up." Doctor: "Oh, you're not going to grow up."
How have you been recently?
Oh, just playing some Rhydon.
What’s Rhydon?
Rhydon deez nutz!
When a 68 year old teacher says: "I am going to tackle an intruder if I have to!"
Me: "Oh hell nah"
I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it... Oh, wait.
(Bus Driver) What did you learn in school today?
(Kid) We learned that you are a sussy baka.
(Bus Driver) Oh yeah? Well, I quit!
(Kid) Quit what?
(Bus Driver) Living.
(Kid) But it was a joke!
(Bus Driver) Doesn't matter. I will die, but you will still be alive.
(Kid) Ok.
(Bus Driver) That was a joke, too!
The other day I started watching Game of Thrones.
I told my friend about it. Told him all about the violence, murder, decapitation, gore, sex, gay sex, midget sex, prostitution, rape, paedophilia, incest, and inbreeding... And he was like: "Oh, so you're still on the first episode then?"
A guy runs into a bar and yells, “Quick! How tall is a penguin?”
The bartender says, “Three feet tall.”
The guy says, “Oh my God! I just ran over a nun!”
Ex-bf's gf: You're so ugly as hell.
Me: Oh, did I mention that I was trying to be you?