Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

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"Sanderson, fire a warning shot."

"Uhh sir, this is an M32 rotary grenade launcher."

"Ah potato-potato, just pull the trigger."

Why couldn't the astronaut put the helmet on his head?

Because he didn't have enough space.

Spanish is difficult. When my mom gives me food, she says "toma," and that's drink in English, so I always drink my food.

Have you ever stepped in Stephen Hawking's house?

Neither has he. 😂😂

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.

My Bff: Hey do want any coffee?

Me: Yeh, of course.

My Bff: Ok which one?

Me: You know... the black one.

Me: Like my soul...

My Bff: Jeez you ok?

What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.

My cat sleeps about 20 hours a day. She has her food prepared for her. She can eat whenever she wants, 24/7/365. Her meals are provided at no cost to her. She visits the doctor once a year for her checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise. For this she pays nothing, and nothing is required of her.

She lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than she needs, but she is not required to do any upkeep. If she makes a mess, someone else cleans it up. She has her choice of luxurious places to sleep. She receives these accommodations absolutely free. She is living like a queen, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever. All of her costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day.

I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head, Holy Sh*t, my cat is a Democrat!

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