Musician jokes
"Rapeboat" makes Elton John seem straight.
Why was the rapper always in good shape?
Because he never skipped a beat!
Why did the rapper bring a ladder to the concert?
Because he wanted to reach new heights in his performance.
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he knew how to cook up FRESH BEETS!
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to cook?
Lil' Seasoning.
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
To make some DOUGH while he dropped his beats!
What do you call a rapper who LOVES math?
2Pac-square
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common?
Their last big hit was the wall.
Why did the rapper become a mathematician?
To count his STACKS of CASH.
What did the rapper say to the traffic jam?
"Move over, I'm about to drop some FIRE!"
Bill Clinton is no longer playing the saxophone.
He is now playing the whore-monica.
What do you call a rapper who’s also a DOCTOR?
MC Healer.
What’s the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?
Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.
When you reconstruct Michael Jackson and Lil Nas X to wreak havoc on preschool.
Michael Jackson goes to the doctor.
Michael Jackson: "Help, doctor, I've been shot!" Doctor: "I can't fix that, but I can change your skin color so it doesn't happen again."
Who am I rooting for during the Super Bowl? Easy. Taylor Swift.
I beat up a failed musician until he started crying.
I thought a few hits would cheer him up!
I'm shocked that Kanye West never tried to get Carrie Underwood's number after Carrie starred in a pro-Aryan ad for Almay.
What's the difference between Carrie Underwood and a robot?
A robot can feign empathy.
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite poker hand?
Jacks and 5.