Moving In jokes

Me: Hey, how are you?

Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3

Insomnia: Mommy, can we get a home?

Anxiety: Insomnia, wait for mommy to finish.

Depression: Anyway, here is my resume!

Me: Okie, thank you. Ok... mhmmm... WOW! Okie, this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it...)

Depression: Also, I have two more friends that want to move in too!

Me: Ok, and their names?

Depression: Their names are: PTSD and Trauma!

Me: Ok, they seem fine (Doesn't know about them)

Depression: Okie, here is the money (a penny :(). Thank you, we will call you if we need anything.

Me: Ok, see you soon! :3

Me now hates my life. :)

"In chess, a queen can move in more directions than the king."

I mean, yeah, the chessboard looks like a kitchen floor, so-

Being the first to move in chess.

It’s a white privilege.

What is a Mexican's favorite move in a video game?

Wall jumping.

What is a terrorist's first move in chess?

C4.

(First Person): Knock knock, who's there? (2nd Person): Lemme talk to you, when we finna slide, what we finna do, knock knock, who's there, time to make a move, slayin' all then demons and we gotta move in too.

(Second Person): Knock knock, (1st p): who's there, let me talk to you, be careful where you steppin' out cause you ain't bullet proof, knock knock, who's there? time to make a move, block is full of shooters, and they didn't come to hoop.

Billy moved in with 69 pedophiles when he was 8. Many "tears" came across his cheeks.

Mom: Son, did you go to school?

Son: What if I said yes?

Mom: You are in school! *slap*

Son: Mom, I am moving out and I am moving in with my girlfriend.

Mom: You are with...? Please don't move out =(

Son: Mom, stop! So what if I am moving out? I am moving into my girlfriend's home. It's only for school.

Mom: Well, you are kicked out of my home!

Son: Good.

Mom: I am sad now. Why did he move out?

If you like it, please commit down.

I kicked a soccer ball at the kid in the wheelchair. Now we're playing Rocket League.

Since it started raining, all my wife has done is look sadly through the stupid window. If it gets any worse, I'll have to let her in.

My mom told me it's not healthy to stay in my room all day... but the only places I'm allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.

It's been raining for days. My wife is totally depressed. She keeps looking through the window. If this keeps up, I'll have to let her in.

My midget landlord told me to pack my things up and that I've got 30 minutes to get out. That's short notice!