Michael

Michael jokes

Wish

Farrah Fawcett, upon arriving at the pearly gates, God asked her, for having led such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe.

Five hours later, Michael Jackson died.

Toy

What's Michael Jackson's favorite toy?

Wet 6-year-old balls.

Pronoun

You: Hey, Alexa, what is your gender?

Alexa: I identify as Michael Jackson, and my pronouns are...

Me: *hears it* And their pronouns are he/he.

Memes

Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson

Why does Michael Jackson avoid Pepsi? They gave him a hot one.

Kid

What do Miss Reeves and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both have a touchy feeling for kids.

Bed

So, I met Michael Jackson before he died. He dragged me to his bed.

s/o

I play saxophone, and I like to tell everyone I am a registered s/o (short for saxophone operator) in hopes of one day starting a jazz band, but now everyone looks at me weird, and when I go to house parties to perform, everyone hides their children, but little do they know I LOVE children. For some reason, I got multiple restraining orders because I said, “I want to touch the kids so they can one day become musicians themselves... like Michael Jackson.” I have then since moved from my hometown to Florida, where I can meet up with other s/o’s, and surprisingly, they have similar stories to me, but they say they have never even touched a saxophone, but they do like touching kids, which I’m all down for, just me and my buddies showing the new youth their abilities.

Update: i figured out what they meant by s/o is not the same as my s/o :(

Masturbation

Why did you always see Michael Jackson wearing two white gloves?

Because masturbation is against Michael Jackson's religious beliefs.

Name

Did you hear that Michael Jackson changed his name from Michael Smith? Well, at least he's honest.

Impression

My impression of Michael Jackson's butler:

When answering the phone: "No, sorry, he's dead." *hangs up phone*

Dream

What is blonde, has six legs, and roams Michael Jackson’s dreams every night?

Hanson.