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me at 3:00 trying to summon jesus:

The image is blurry and dark, it shows a person with their face close to the camera, the text above the image says "me at 3:00 trying to summon jesus:"

self-deprecation

A four-panel comic strip. Panel 1 shows a priest in a church saying, "LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF" to a congregation, including a blonde woman. Panel 2 shows the blonde woman outside saying, "HELLO NEIGHBOR" to a man getting out of his car. Panel 3 shows the man responding, "YOU FUCKING MORON". Panel 4 shows the man continuing, "YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF HUMAN SHIT". The text below indicates the source: "BY EXTRA FABULOUS COMICS FOR Cyanide and Happiness © Explosm.net."

God

God’s buzz cut

A cartoon of a muscular, bald man with a purple toga and a gold medallion on it. The man has a slight smile.

Dagger

For some unexplainable reason I instantly though “hmm this sounds like something for dagger”

An image of a knight in full armor with a text overlay that reads "Here we can see two men eager to reclaim the holy land, staring at each other."

Jesus

jesus

A painting of Jesus with a modern fade haircut and beard, set against a backdrop of soft lighting and a halo.

Man

A man wearing glasses and a plaid shirt stands next to a red barbecue grill, holding a can. He is wearing a blue apron that says 'DON'T ASK ME FOR THE SECRET FAMILY RECIPE'. To his right, a golden retriever dog sits on the floor, also wearing a blue apron. The dog's apron says 'I SAW THE FACE OF GOD AND IT WAS WEEPING'.

God

The image shows a split-screen. On top, a man with no arms is saying, "Through God, all things are possible." Below him, a woman is yelling, "DO 10 PUSH UPS RIGHT NOW!"

Holiday

The image shows a comic panel with two characters. On the left side, a 'soyjak' character initially says, "Easter was actually originally a pagan holiday!" then in the second row, he is saying, "BUT WE ...", and in the third he is crying saying, "THAT'S NOT...". On the right side, a man in a priest garb is saying, "Keep complaining and we'll take Toyotathon and make it a Christian holiday too." Then in the second row, he says "You just lost Shark Week", and in the third, "SHARK WEEK IS A WEEK LONG CHRISTIAN FESTIVAL NOW."

Jesus ballin

A 3D rendering of Jesus holding a basketball. The text on the image says "repost if jesus ballin".

Bible

A cartoon shows a man crucified on a cross, with the text 'The BIBLE APP is FREE' above the man, plus some small emojis and the number 100.

Church

...

The image shows two scenes. In the first, a woman is pointing her finger at a child and saying "Your imaginary friend is not real". In the second, the same woman and child are sitting in pews at a church, with the text "Sunday" above their heads.

Sacrifice

we must sacrifice barbie

A Barbie doll is fixed to a black cross made of plastic bags. The cross is hanging on a wall.

Baptism

Crap, not again

An image shows a painting of a man with a halo holding a book. Text reads: "When the ceremony's been over for hours and you remember you didn't take the baby out of the water after the baptism." The book reads "AMORIS LAETITIA".

Child

The image shows a wallet full of money lying on the ground, surrounded by wood chips. The text above the wallet asks, "As a child of god, what's your next move?" The text below the wallet says "To thank him".

Question

A drawing shows two people. One person, wrapped in bandages, is standing. The other one is crouched in a corner looking sad. The text above them says: this isn't a disrespectful question btw. if you're catholic you believe Christ was fully human, fully divine. To deny that he had sexual temptations implies that he wasn't fully human, making you a blasphemer (punishable by excommunication for most of history) now answer: boobs. or ass.

Privilege

A stack of crayons with labels that appear to be satirical. The labels include "Travel Ban Brown", "Lives Matter", "Auschwitz Ash", "Privilege", "Cyantology", "Spiritual but not Religious", "Statutory Grape", "Boner Pill Blue", "Insufferable Vegan Green", "Corporations Are People Too", "Baby Shit Green", "Self-Identified Blue", "Presidential", and "Your Parents' Divorce Was Your Fault, Peach".

Deer

The top image shows a yellow road sign with a deer symbol and the text "SUICIDAL DEER" and "NEXT 5 MILES". The bottom image shows a deer running with an explosive belt strapped to its body and the text "ALLAHU AKBAR".

Brother

r’amen, brothers

The image depicts a parody of Michelangelo's "The Creation of Adam" where the Flying Spaghetti Monster is reaching out to touch the finger of Adam instead of God.

Kill Yourself

It says the truth

A picture of Jesus with one finger pointing to the viewer and his other hand showing a thumbs up. The text on the image says "GO KILL YOURSELF!!!!".

Counter

How to counter attack jesus christ

The image shows a four-panel split image. The first panel shows a portrait of Jesus Christ. The second panel shows a closeup of a character from Yu-Gi-Oh! looking determined. The third panel shows a hammer and several nails. The fourth panel shows a character from Yu-Gi-Oh! looking shocked and scared with his eyes wide open and his mouth gaping.

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