Many jokes
How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just sit in the dark and bitch.
How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But you need 5000 Soviet troops in case he goes on strike!
Why are so many people mean to orphans?
They can’t cry to their parents.
It's funny how you feel so alone with depression, and yet once you tell people on some random website, so many people relate. Unfortunately, it doesn't stop the loneliness.
Why does Stephen Hawking always say he's got so many bitches?
Because he is never around Siri.
How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.
What is the tallest building in the entire world? The library, because it has so many stories.
How many shades of gray does it take to make a dirty movie?
50.
Just saying this, but I hate how many little kids there are on this site, and when they post, they have the worst posts about "sex", so I'm just saying how they act immature.
Girlfriend: "One day I will marry and a lot of men will be sad that day."
Boyfriend: "Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?"
During the Wintery Wackiness Wars!
A Soviet Sergeant, stationed stilly near a sloped summit with his silly soldiers!
Then a shout sails from the tippy-top: "A Finnish fighter's fantastic force fractures a hundred heroic Honchos!"
The Kommandant's kerfuffle commences, commanding a caravan of one hundred comrades to conquer the crest!
Nifty navigation notes nil, the nasty news nabs many! After an Hour, hush descends. The high voice hollers, "A Finnish fighter's fantastic force fractures a thousand heroic Honchos!"
Kommander fumes, forcing a further flurry, flinging one thousand fine fellows skyward!
Nearly two hours now and the noisy nuisance ceases, then the shouting starts: "A Finnish fighter's fantastic force fractures ten thousand heroic Honchos!"
The Kommandant kaput! Ten thousand troopers take the trek, taking tanks, trundling skyward, to take the terrain!
Four fearsome, fretful hours then a soldier in tatters comes tumbling, talking: "Stop sending up soldiers, sir! There's two Finns fighting fiercely!"
Why did the Twin Towers die? Because they had too many plane pizzas.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? 327.
Person 1: How many people has Michael Jackson fingered?
Person 2: Dunno, what’s the minor population?
Your Friend: Bro, I'm having a movie sleepover tonight. I've invited 17 people, wanna come?
You: Yeah, but why so many people?
Your Friend: Because the DVD says only 18+ viewers.
You: Dude!!!!
Looking for true love. Must be into fun, likes to go out driving, playing the latest catching game and most importantly, must love kids. (PEADOPHILES MUST APPLY WITH HOW MANY KIDS YOU CAN CARRY!)
Bleach solves so many problems: stains, dirty dishes, messes, and overpopulation.
How many people does it take to change a lightbulb underwater? The results are shocking!
How many Tottenham players does it take to win a trophy? It doesn't matter how hard they try, they still can't win one anyway.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None, that's a hardware problem.