I like your mama's big BUTT, and I cannot lie.
What do you call a toddler lying in the middle of the road? Speed bump.
Q. What is the biggest lie in the entire universe?
A. “I have read and agree to the Terms & Conditions.”
Biggest lie ever told: it was the cat.
A man goes into heaven and there he meets jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says "that is mother teresa's clock it has never moved because she has never lied". "There is Abraham Lincolns clock. He has .lied twice so it has moved twice." "Where is Donald Trump's?" Ask's the man. Jesus answers "it is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan."
Teacher: tell me what's the solution of this equation? 30g + 24y + 15a - x^3 = 0
Student: 69 gay = xxx
Teacher: you're out !!!
Student lies down on the floor, and then teacher starts f...ing him ^_*
😂😂😂😂
What animal lies.A lion
One time this kid came back from school and said "Mom I have one good news and one bad news, which one do you wanna hear first?" And his mom said "Good news please.'' and the boy said "I got 100% on my math test today" and his mom gave him a hug, and the boy said "Now to the bad news, I LIED"
I was at my boyfriends house and I thought he was cheating on me and he was on the phone with somebody he said he'd be over there soon. so i asked him if I could see his phone he said no and then we fought about until I seen his gun and because I thought he was lying to me I shot him,went through his phone and his friend was still on the phone.
Why is the Nazi Anthem banned in Germany? Because Horst Wessel Lied.
Once I went to a museum and over heard someone speaking to an employee for information.
"These are lying clocks, they tell how many lies a person tells."
"oh cool"
"this is mother Teresa's clock, the clock hasn't moved because she never lied."
"Makes sense"
"This is Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands only moved twice indicating he only lied twice."
"Where's Trump's clock"
"Oh, we're using it as a ceiling fan."
And then I burst out laughing 'cause it's so true.
My dad and I went to the hospital once, and he said he'd be fine and it'd only take a few minutes.
Lying bastard never came out.
My crush said that she would rather die than have sex with me...it turns out that she was lying.
A blond a bernet and a red head walked into a bar the bartender told them their was a magic merror in the bathroom.He said that if you spoke the truth infront of the merror you would have your greatest desires but if you told a lie you would disappear .The red head sais that she was the pretiest girl in the bar and she walked out the bathroom and she got athusand dollars.The berrnet walked in and said she was the smartest one in the bar she walked out the ber with a new car.The bland went she said I think poof she was gone
Stephen Hawking walked to the shop I lied 😄
make sense of what I am saying, This is a LIE- and that's the TRUTH.
what am I? answer: a Riddle.
How do you annoy Pinocchio? Ask him "Do you always tell lies?" (think about it)
what is red, green, lies in a ditch and is covered in cookie crumbs?
...a girl scout that got hit by a car
What do you call a person with no arms or legs lying face first in a river? BOB What do you call two people with no arms or legs standing in front of a window? Curt and Rod
Q: why was barbie kicked out of the toy box A: she sat on pinocchios face and siad "lie to me
