Keller jokes
How did Helen Keller dance? Very Bad.
How did Helen Keller draw? With her hand.
Why did Helen Keller’s boyfriend have wax on his finger? Because he was whispering sweet nothings into her ear!
Did you know that Helen Keller had a twin?
Yeah, Helen ate her in the womb.
Why was Helen Keller so bad at driving?
Because she's a woman.
Why did Helen Keller burn her hands?
Because she was trying to read the waffle iron.
How does Helen Keller smell?
Pretty bad, she's dead!
(1968) - Hellen Keller died, didn’t you hear?
No?
Well neither did she.
Why did you scream? Oh... Helen Keller tried to cook... 😨
What part of the Earth does Helen Keller not have?
The sea.
You didn't know that Helen Keller is dead? It's fine; neither does she.
I gave Helen Keller an Oculus and AirPods for her 12th birthday, and she hated them and me.
Helen Keller is so Helen Keller-y that nobody will be as good as Helen Keller.
Who was the meanest man in the world?
He raped Helen Keller and threw her down a well, but not before cutting off her fingers so she couldn't yell for help.
Do you know Helen Keller?
Yes.
Did you know she had a dog?...... Neither did she!
What did Helen Keller's mother do to her when she was mad at her?
She left the plunger in the toilet, she put doorknobs on all the walls, and she rearranged the furniture.
Helen Keller deaf-initely faked it!
Hellen Keller walked into a bar... then a table... then a chair.
Have you ever walked into Helen Keller’s house?
She has.
Why can’t Helen Keller have kids?
Answer: She’s dead.
The bands Def Leppard and Blind Melon did a collaboration.
They called the song “Helen Keller.”