Job jokes
Why did the hooker quit her job?
She had a nut allergy.
What's the difference between your job and a dead hooker?
Your job still sucks.
Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP.
John: Hi, boss, it is raining heavily today, so I will not be coming.
Boss: You stated in your job application that swimming was your hobby, so see you at 11 AM.
I just found out my ex got stabbed today... let's just say I lost my job as a butcher.
How did the security guard at the orchid get better at his job? He got an Apple Watch.
I hate these double standards.
If you burn a body at a crematorium you're "doing a good job". If you do it at home you're "destroying evidence".
I saw a little kid crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working at an orphanage.
I have many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.
I'd tell you a joke about unemployed people, but none of them work.
If I'm the night guard at the Samsung store, does that make me a guardian of the galaxy?
Why did the orphan become a stripper?
So she could have someone to call daddy.
Funny thing happened today, my dad came home from work which is weird cause he’s a suicide bomber.
I seriously don't get why people in Alabama are angered that Mexican immigrants are taking their jobs. I mean, it's not like they are preventing your son from giving you a big, fat blow job.
Once I saw a girl crying and asked, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at orphanages.
My grief counselor died today. He did such a great job. I don't even care.
I have many jokes about unemployed people, but sadly, none of them seemed to have worked.
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home, there were signs everywhere.
Why was the man fired from a calendar factory? He took a day off.
Why are there a lot of whites in hockey?
It’s the only other job that involves beating something black other than being a cop.