My ex died today. I also lost my job as a butcher
"How was your day?" "It was great" "what was so great about it?" "i saw a puppy" "awww" "and i ran over it :)"
I got a job at a library,i got fired after 15 minutes,they told me it was because I put women's right in fiction section
Once I almost died ill give it another shot out of the gun to finish my job
Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing!
Why did the Headless Horseman get a job? He was trying to get ahead in life.
As an actor going to film a new TV show in another country, when TSA asks “what’s the purpose of your visit?”... “I’m going to shoot a pilot” is never a good answer
Why was the computer late for work
He had a hard drive
Guy asked me what I do for a living. Now I'm not old enough to get a job so I said nothing. He asked me again so I said, "Your wife" The guy goes to slap me but his wife is standing right there. She instead slapped me and said, "You swore not to tell!"
where do mermaids get a job?
at the kelp wanted station
I did a ton of work, a skele-ton
If you were to ask me, 'What is the easiest job in the world?', it would be an Australian psychiatrist. "G'Day, G'Day...how you doing...no worries, next!".
so i was asleep and woke up and went to work my wife left already to her job i was driving my car and ran over someone i woke up in my bed realized it was all a dream 20 minutes later i got a phone call the my wife got hit bye a car
prostitutes love their job's their always having a blast
I lost my job by giving up my seat to someone I didn't know you're not supposed to do that if you're a bus driver!
Why did the dwarf get a job at lidl? Because every lidl heps
What’s the difference between a job and a wife
The job keeps sucking after 5 years
Why did the female dicktator get fired she had to much dick
My girlfriend got ran over by a bus I lost my job as a bus driver.
wood fired pizza how would pizza get a job now
