What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
What do vacuums and your mom have in common?
They both suck.
What does the starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?
Answer: They both circle Ur-Anus looking for Kling-Ons!
What do my clothes and a depressed person not have in common?
My clothes don't hang themselves...
What does Michael Jackson and a lion have in common?
They're both predators.
What does a pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common?
They can both smell it, but they can’t eat it.
What do food and dark humor have in common? Some people don’t get it.
What does a phone and a grandma have in common? They both die.
What's the difference between them? If you shove something up your grandma's ass, she won't come back to life.
What do orphans, parents, and trees have in common? They leafed.
What do old people and meth heads have in common? They usually trip over their balls.
What does my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
What do Joe Biden and Russia have in common?
Neither of them respect boundaries.
What do Colorado and Saudi Arabia have in common?
It's legal to get stoned.
What do emo kids and Hitler have in common?
There's gonna be more brains on the wall when they lose something.
What do Jesus and I have in common? Our dads left us...
What do emos and the Twin Towers have in common? There were two, but now there are none.
What does a roller coaster and Michael Jackson have in common?
Kids ride for free.
What do magicians and prostitutes have in common?
Answer: disappearing acts.
Not totally a joke but... What do all these rape joke naysayers have in common with rapists? They are also forcing themselves on others.
What do Phillip Adam and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
